Ben Wardle

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Nicknames: Little Ben, El Wardle, Van Wardlerooy.

Anything good can be referred to as 'Wardle-esque'

Ben Wardle commenced his university career in 2005, living in Goodricke A block for the first year. After installing himself in the JCRC as a social sec, he in his own words "nailed it" by becoming JCRC chair. This was however against no competition, apart from RON who was a close second. After a heart rendering performance of Angels he began his reign as Goodricke Chair for the academic year of 2006-2007.

In academic terms, Ben has thrived in the York environment. Despite struggling against an almost life-threateningly severe case of dyslexia, refusing to attend supervisoral meetings on the grounds that he doesn't believe that King's Mannor really exists, and many hangovers, Ben managed to blag himself a York Award for the highest politics mark for a split course student in his first year. Unfortunatley, this mark does not count towards his degree. The award now hangs proudly on his bedroom wall in The Curryhouse (see below). If you ask nicley, he will tell you all about it. As a side project, Ben has also fostered a keen interest in linguistics during his two years at York. Becoming fluent in German, Spanish, French and Mexican has been the stepping-stone for Ben's own, radical experimenation in the new field of "word mergology", or "wology". Here he has become a world leader and is currently undertaking ground-breaking research towards the elusive three-word-merge (thrwerge - see preliminary research: Wardle 07). Aside from this, Ben has dabbled lightly in photography, focussing on a technique he calls "The 45 Degree Wardle". Twice as potent as Magnum, this iconic pose has been specially formulated to show off Ben's fine profile, whilst still displaying his trademark twinkling eyes. Although it may look effortless, each photograph taken of Ben is followed by hours of intense online scrutiny.

As a child, Ben spent some years living in Norway. Here he learnt to ski, possibly before he learnt to walk. His older brother (whose name nobody actually knows) once saved his life when he almost fell off a ski lift. It was in Norway that Ben made his only International Rugby appearence for the infamous Norway U7's.

Prior to University, Ben was educated in several schools. One of these schools apparently had a massive drugs problem, although Ben has now, thankfully, shaken his habit and banished those demons. During the course of his education Ben met his two great amigos - Jonny and "my mate" Dan. Dan looks remarkably like Andre Shevchenko. Jonny really likes Top Gun. Ben's true education began, however, on his gap year. Although the exact route of his travels through the Far East and Australasia has been lost in the midsts of time, what remains clear is that Ben was, at some point, in Cambodia (where he watched England play in a local shack-bar, surrounded by laughing Cambodian children), Thailand (where he purchased his now iconic Thai fisher trousers for a mere half of one English penny) and Australia. Whilst in Australia, Ben purchased a camper van with "my mate" Dan and drove along the coast for a number of months. At some point, he replaced "my mate" Dan with a Swedish bloke. No details of this Swedish bloke have ever been revealed. Later, Ben was to pick up a mysterious Australian traveller, who turned out to be a contestant on Australian Big Brother. Despite being sworn to secrecy, Ben will tell anybody this without much persuasion. This unnamed Australian caused quite a stir in Oz for being a bloody nice bloke and then getting evicted because he slept with two of his fellow contestants. Ben would describe him as "a legend". During his trip along the Australian coast, Ben somehow managed to spare several weeks to work in a cocktail bar, where he learnt the ancient Aboriginal art of "flaring". He also worked for a short while as a bouncer, allowing him to develop his characteristic authority and leadrership skills. He can also say "Can you finish your drinks please folks, thank yooou!" and "Mind your backs plase folks, thank yoooou!" in such a manner that people instantly obey. Ben also, amazingly, found the time to become a regular in a local men's rugby team. Despite the fitness levels being lower than he was previously used to, full grown Australian "blokes" hit harder than at English 6th Form level. Shocking.

As stated earlier, the exact chronology of Ben's gap year has become unclear in its constant, fragmentary re-telling. Needless to say, when Ben did return to England he was so skint that he could'nt actually afford a taxi all the way back home. He simply stepped in a cab and told the driver to take him as far as he could get with the little money he had about his person. The genial, good-humoured driver chortled at the you traveller's spendthrift attitude and agreed to take him all the way, on the sole condition that Ben would not shut up for the entire duration of the journey. Wardle happily obliged.

Ben's cultural influence on York has been unprecedented. Through his twin loves of the 1980's and mainstream house music, Ben has transformed the map of Yorkshire cool. Reflex is now THE place to be before Ziggys on a Wednesday. Calvin Harris is right, it was acceptable in the 80's, and according to Wardle, its still acceptable now. Thanks to Ben's unwaivering support (i.e. playing on repeat for days on end in his room), Mason vs Princess Superstar has recieved thier long due acclaim for their masterpiece "Perfect (Exceeder). His devout following of all things 80's has also led to a resurgence of interest in Bon Jovi, Dexy's Midnight Runners and Bryan Adams. Hoorah!

Socially, Ben has experienced a meandering path. In his early days as a fresher he would often frequent York's nightclubs regularly and at one point looked set to take on a postion as a lecturer in York's world renowned Mackanomics Deptartment. Since this bright start, however, we have seen a vast change. He now suffers immensely from hangovers, brought on by "all the sugar and shit" in cheap alchopops such as Apple VK's. It has been claimed that the only way for him to recover from such an occurrence is to write off a whole day, spending the morning frying.

Ben's rugby career at York did not flourish, but his footballing career certainly has. A key member of the successful 'Danger Galore' 6-a-side team, Ben has patented a trick almost as elusive to the footballing community as the Iron Lotus is to pairs figure skating; the Wardle Dummy Backheel (aka Chicken-step). It is as simple as it sounds, but deviously hard to see coming. It was recently stolen by Rio Ferdinand in an international, resulting in only his 2nd goal for his country. It is believed the goal was dedicated to Ben.

His move to "The Curryhouse" for his second year at York was an important milestone for the young academic. It allowed him more freedom to model some of his now renowned fashion garments, including the Wardle cK's (complete with holes) and the Thai fisher trousers. Ben has also brought out his now famous "dancing shoes" since moving to The Curryhouse. These mythical loafers respond directly to Bon Jovi, Chesney Hawkes or any banging house anthems, transforming Ben into the greatest dancer on the face of the planet. All in all, The Curryhouse has provided Ben with the comfortable enivronment he needs in order to express himself through his clothes, the only way he knows how...

Ben also developed a mild condition in his second year at york, impulsive rhetoric questioning, in which he must answer every question directed at him with the monosyllabic utterance, "me?". Doctors are still deciding the seriousness of the condition, and whether it is related to his dyslexia. There are fears that it will cause him to become socially excluded on the grounds of it being "really really annoying". The condition is caused due to conflict between the left and right hemispheres of his brain, which are thought to be slowly merging together due to his aforementioned research. It is on these grounds that his funding for research has recently been cut due to a moral dilemma faced by his trustees. This has forced him to fund himself by shredding paper for the summer.

In his time recovering from a near-fatal ankle sprain while playing kick-ups in early 2008, Wardle developed an acute concern for the disabled and oppressed of the world. It was at this time in his life ('the red chair period') that he was able to empathise with those less fortunate; in his own words: "Having broken (sprained) my ankle, it kinda makes me wonder what it would be like to be permanently in a wheelchair". Soon after he developed his vision of disabled access in the Curryhouse.